Why do we feel Angry, Frustrated or even Irriated?

Everyone has something that they stand for, something in which they would believe so strongly, that telling them otherwise, is literally asking for trouble.

Well that our peronal belief system. If there is anything happening in your life, that is making your frustrated or irritated, sometimes even angry, then it stands to show that what is happening around you, is conflicting with your personal beliefs. Something like the attitude that was given to you by the hawker whom you bought your lunch from, or perhaps the way you were treated by your colleague.

Well that what happened to me, especially when the subject is about money and risk. Sad to say, I think I might have the 'I think I know about money, risk and investment more than you' attitude, unless the person i'm speaking is definitely more experienced than I am.

Thankfully, I noticed it soon enough, and could make an effort to be open and to listen to what the other party had to say before passing judgement of any sort.

Arguements and quarrels usually arise because of the difference in the belief system between two people, especially between couples who spend so much time together. 2 different beliefs and views of money, and each on the extreme end, will definitely cause friction especially between couples, when one spends as much as he/she earns while the other tries to save as much as possible.

This system is neutral and does not sway towards good or bad. It's the belief within this system that determines the results in our lives. You might not agree with me totally on this but give me a moment to explain.

If you believe that to be successful in life, you need to put in loads of hard work and long hours. However, the moment you were overjumped when the time came for promotion, you would have been furious and definitely would demand an answer as to why you were not chosen. The shocking answer that you would hear from your boss would have been that the guy who was promoted simply just produced better results.

Well in the above scenario, our belief system worked to our disadvantage, but how it may work to our advantage is that if we believe that stealing is bad, this system will act as a hinderance if you happen to find yourself in that scenario. The thought of stealing would have been very uncomfortable and voices in your head will tell you that you shouldn't do it.

Well you may argue that there are scenarios where teenagers are peer pressured into stealing, but the same would have applied to them, however, they just decided to go ahead anyway. And usually once gone against that belief in the system would have been weaken and therefore easier to remove and reprogram.

Things of note:

- Our belief system can work against us or with us.

- Learn to identify your limiting beliefs and by changing them, you can change your way of life.

- Knowing your beliefs can help you to prevent arguements.

What is Faith all about?

No, not the faith referred to in religion, but the faith that you need to have when you are unsure of what is to come and yet you still need to believe in whatever that you are able to do and just do it anyway.

For me, over the weekend was I would say, a wake up call and a turning point. Faced with a decision, that really got me seriously thinking.

Though the decision should have been an easy one, given the teachings from my parents, to work hard first and enjoy later. But I really did want to think things through and to make sure that this was how I really felt and that was what I really wanted.

Still there was many other considerations that I had in mind, thinking about whether I am up for everything that is to come and whether I will be prepared.

I guess once I have made the decision, the rest is just to have faith and believe that it will be successful. Take the first step and the rest of the way will show itself to you, I really didn't know what to start or how I could prepare myself for all of it. I didn't know what I was lacking.

But true enough, on Monday, I was enlightened and there I have my second step. Now its about taking that next step and moving forward towards the next step and whats more to come.

I have decided to take another decisive step towards my dream, even though there are people around me who are worrying for me, I know they care, and I do not wish to disappoint them.

Have you ever thought about your dreams, take a moment now, think about what you would like to have or what kind of life that you would like to live. Put yourself in that moment, that instance, see it from 'your eyes' from within that image, let the image continue to 'roll' for the next minute or so.

How do you feel? A sense of achievement that you have finally achieved it? Or just happiness and joy? Comfort and Satisfaction? Relaxed and unburdened?

Everyone has their own dreams, but are you taking an step towards it? 1 step a day will still take you to your dream. This reminds me of a folk lore, 'There was once a farmer, who had a big hill in front of his house. Every time he or his wife wanted to go to the town, they would have to either climb over the hill or walk around it. One day he decided to start levelling the hill. People who walked pass asked what he was doing, and when he told them that he wanted to level the hill, they said that it wasn't possible and it would take forever to do so. He replied, I will do it shovel by shovel, and if I do not live to finish levelling this hill, my children will continue to do so, one day the hill will be levelled.'

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

Have you taken yours yet? I know I have taken mine. Though there are times, that i'm fearful, faith, support from your loved ones and holding on to your dream will keep you going.

Things to note:

Overcome fear with faith, you have to believe in what is to come. Do your due diligence and if the direction that you are heading is the right one, then have faith and take the plunge.

Action beats inaction. If you are lost, or unsure, but you need to move forward, take the first step anyway. Things have a way of magically unfolding itself.

Small actions taken will add up to a big action. Write a composition 10 words a day and you will have a 100 words composition by the end of 10 days. Do not say that anything is impossible.

Perserve, it will happen one day. Stop looking for those instant gratifications. The best things in life that last, do not come immediately, just like your baby takes 9 months before he/she is born. or you definitely spend months or years trying to get the girl of your dreams. Are they worth waiting for? You betcha they are.

See your dream clearly, hold it in your mind, live your dream. That is what will keep you going when you are tired, defeated and dying to give up.

I shall leave you with a song that is ties in very much to what I have said,

"Go the Distance" by Michael Bolton

I have often dreamed of a far-off place
Where a hero's welcome would be waiting for me
Where the crowds will cheer when they see my face
And a voice keeps saying 'This is where I'm meant to be'
I'll be there someday
I can go the distance

I will find my way if I can be strong
I know ev'ry mile will be worth my while
When I go the distance I'll be right where I belong

Down an unknown road to embrace my fate
Though that road may wander it will lead me to you
And a thousand years would be worth the wait
It might take a lifetime but somehow I'll see it through
And I won't look back
I can go the distance

And I'll stay on track. No, I won't accept defeat
It's an uphill slope but I won't lose hope
Till I go the distance and my journey is complete
But to look beyond the glory is the hardest part
For a hero's strength is measured by his heart

Like a shooting star, I will go the distance
I will search the world I will face its harms
I don't care how far, I can go the distance
Till I find my hero's welcome waiting in your arms
I will search the world I will face its harms
Till I find my hero's welcome Waiting in your arms


If I ever need encouragement, this is the song I would listen to.

Where is the benefit in Complaining?

I'm sure everyone has encountered situations where you are listening in to your friends while they complain about their jobs, spouses, boss, kids, parents, grandparents or just about anything under the sun. You might notice that you yourself being caught up in the whirl of complains and start complaining about things as well.

Well I used to be like this, though I still do listen to others complain sometimes. But other than that, I try not to complain about anything at all. Complaining serve no purpose other than to let out the steam that has been building up inside of you. Why complain when its much more productive to just find a solution around that issue? I suppose most people, including yourself, know what you must or should do, to remedy the situation but just refuse to do so, mostly because you are afraid. Afraid that you might offend your spouse, boss, parents, etc. Afraid of the outcome that might result from it, like you might be thinking if you stood up against your boss, he might fire you in the process.

Well I must say that there are many different ways to handle a situation, no one solution is correct and the best part is there is no 'right' answer. Unlike in school, where we learn never to make mistakes. In life, if we do not make a mistake at all, we will never learn from them. Just like when you were a baby, you didn't learn to walk the first time round you stood up. You stood up, fell down and stood up again, why? What happened to our desire to make mistakes and improve yourself along the way? I digress...

Complaining about anything at all, always allow us to see the negative side of life, like how lousy my job is or I'm struck with a horrible spouse with uncontrollable children.

Why do we not see the good things that we have in our life more often and talk about them? Like being grateful that you have a roof over your heads or that you are able to fill your stomachs 3 times a day. Or grateful that your dog is there to greet you after a long tiring day to welcome you home. Grateful for your friends who stood by you when you are down. About having money in your pocket to indulge in your simple daily pleasures, like a cup of your favorite coffee.

Try it right now... Start thinking about that things that you are grateful for and notice how different you start to feel. You will start feeling good, 'warm and fuzzy' as they call it. Instead of feeling the frustration, anger or that feeling of self pity.

How many more people's day can we brighten when we are feeling good ourselves?

Key points:

• Complaining makes you focus on negative things in life.
• There are many solutions to a situation. Decide the best for yourself, and if the best of solutions make you fearful, just face it anyway.
  
• Feel grateful makes you focus on the things in life that you already have and because of it you are enjoying your life.

The First Post

After much comtemplation, I finally decided to start this blog. Well, writing about what I have learnt in my life, would pretty much sum up what this blog is about. I am sure everyone of us has our own story to tell, and through telling them, we learn from each other and learn yet another from our own stories.

I initially wanted to write about what I know about managing money, but I suppose it is a very sensitive issue and not many people would like hearing about it and it would limit what I could write in this blog.

Last but not least, I welcome all constructive feedback and any possible suggestions for topics to write about. :)